Ready Player, Apple Vision Pro

Look around. Remember this. This slant of light. Remember this. This is it. Because everything's about to change. 5,000 patents, including eye-tracking akin to mind-reading, Apple just made history.

“You know what’s funny? When I knew I was getting the Vision Pro, I said to myself, ‘I never actually want to be seen wearing it. As of yesterday about 5 million people have seen me wearing this thing.” — the guy on the left who made one of the best videos I’ve seen about the Vision Pro, linked after the jump

It is the most Singularity Singularity-ness that ever did Singularity.

The world just changed.

“I’ve Just Spent 24 Hours Watching Nothing But ‘I’ve Spent 24 Hours Wearing the Apple Vision Pro’ Videos on YouTube.”

(Should I have just called this article that, perhaps?)

What to say to communicate why I feel so gobsmacked right now?

Here’s a little sampling for you of people feeling gobsmacked themselves:

“I would say my experience was religious.” — director James Cameron, who has been working in VR for 18 years

“Apple feels more and more like a tech fentanyl dealer that poses as a rehab provider.” — an unidentified Silicon Valley investor

“We’re in a Black Mirror episode; humans are cooked.” — online commenter

Here’s everything I’ve learned about this fascinating, uncannily released on Groundhog’s Day, world-upending device that has already sold a quarter-million units despite the $3500 price-tag shock—including how to develop apps for it, what stocks are tied to it, what opportunities lie in livestreaming, what the thing looks like completely broken down part by intricate part, why you should expect to see more people in public wearing it and exactly what stage in Jean Baudrillard’s Simulacres et Simulation we are likely living in right now.