Here are 20 things you can say when you have nothing to say

“Tell me the provenance of the fading ketchup stain on your shirt.” That one’s a bonus. And it’s cute because it’s a little neg, too.

I took this picture at a steakhouse. I call it “right about to get my period” steakhouse glow.

We saw two movies in one day this weekend. The first was that new Nic Cage movie. It has one of the more beloved actors who had a brief sexy arc in Game of Thrones in it—that Spanish dude—along with the Irish chick who plays the wife in Catastrophe. For me, the…